Who Can We Trust?

John Bradley "JJ" Jackson

17 Feb 2026 • 2 min read

A common definition of trust is when you rely on the integrity, strength, or
ability of another person. It’s an expression of confidence in others. At
times, we just trust others; many other times, trust has to be earned.

Trust is a choice.

Why are we so stingy with our trust? Part of it comes from experience. People break promises, disappoint us, or behave badly, and over time we learn to be cautious. We protect ourselves because making ourselves vulnerable again after being hurt feels risky. This is why many people develop a tendency toward mistrust which is a kind of self-defense that says, “Better safe than sorry.”

Trust is more than just a habit formed by past hurts. It’s also rooted in early human behavior. Trust helped our ancestors survive. In early human societies, strangers or tribe members who trusted one another were more likely to cooperate, share food, build shelter, and ultimately survive. That evolutionary wiring still influences us today. Trust can trigger the release of hormones like Oxytocin (see postscript), which helps us make connections.

Because trust is partly hard-wired, research also shows that our willingness to trust others varies from person to person and that it isn’t completely fixed. People can trust more by effort and positive social experiences.

Still, the caution born from past disappointment plays an important role. We are naturally inclined to judge trustworthiness by observing patterns of behavior such as how consistent someone is, how honestly they communicate, and how dependable their actions are. Thus, trust isn’t just an emotion; it’s based on evidence.

Yet, this same learned caution can impede our growth with new people, new partnerships, and new ideas. If we are too slow to trust, we miss opportunities to connect, learn, and build meaningful relationships. As John Wooden advised, "Sometimes the best way forward is to trust first, if we can."

My take is that there are many good people out there; give them a chance and learn trust them through healthy, mutual experiences.

Trust me?

P.S. Oxytocin is a hormone and neurotransmitter crucial for social bonding, trust, and reproduction, produced in the hypothalamus and released by the pituitary gland. It is called the "love drug". Okay, I had to look this up.