All My Friends Started Out as Strangers

Six months ago, I closed one chapter and opened another. After more than 30 years in Southern California, I retired and moved to Washington state. The update? It’s stunning up here. The trees, the water, the quiet. And best of all, my kids and grandkids are close. I am blessed.

Still, transitions come with a price. I miss my SoCal community. The easy breakfast meetings. The familiar faces. The friendships built over decades.

It got me thinking about something simple, but powerful. Every one of those friendships started the same way. As strangers. Over time, those strangers fell into four types. Please bear with me.

Acquaintances.
The people you recognize. A quick hello. A short exchange. They are part of your environment, but not yet part of your life. In a career sense, these are your early connections. The people in the room. The ones who may one day matter more than you think. For me remembering their names is hard. I use clever terms such as buddy or man.

Casual friends.
Now you have something in common. Work. A hobby. A shared interest. You spend time together, but it is still situational and transactional. Many professional relationships live here. Maybe the neighbors next door, too. And that is fine. Not every connection needs to go deeper.

Close friends.
Trust now enters the picture. You share more. They know your story. These are the people who actually show up when things go sideways. In business and in life, these relationships are gold. They challenge you, steady you, and often open doors you could not open alone. Close friends may be just a blessed few. Sadly, there is evidence that close friends in the new millennium are in decline (more on this in a future blog).

Lifelong friends.
These are rare. Time tested. Distance proof. You may not speak every day, but when you do, you pick up right where you left off. These friendships shape who you are. They are priceless.

What strikes me now is how fluid this all is. Friendships evolve. Some grow. Some fade. That is not failure. That is life.

Making new friends, especially later in life, can feel awkward. But it usually starts small. One shared interest. One conversation. That is it. That is how it always begins. (For me, a shared interest might be the Lakers (harder up in Puget Sound area), horses, dogs, or high fidelity audio.

It also needs to be said that letting go of friends matters too. Not every relationship is meant to last forever. Holding on too tightly can crowd out space for new people to enter your life. Goodbye can be replaced with hello.

As I settle into Washington, I remind myself of this. The strangers I meet today may become the friends I value tomorrow.

That is how it has always worked.

That is a comforting thought.

John Bradley Jackson
© 2026 All rights reserved.

P.S. There is a popular belief that if a friendship lasts seven years, it is likely to last a lifetime. By that point, it has already survived moves, career changes, and life transitions. There is something to that.

P.S.S. If we have been friends for seven years or more, you may be stuck with me.